Bittersweet

Bittersweet

Yesterday was my last day breastfeeding the boys.  I’d be lying if I said I didn’t tear up.  I had reduced our feedings from 3 times a day to twice a day then just the mornings.  I’m so proud of the three of us making it 14.5 months!!  I’m going to miss looking down and seeing the little heart the three of us would make.  The way the boys would curl in their inner arms and almost hold hands… the way they’d laugh at each other and I was forced to hold one of their arms back so they wouldn’t poke each other in the eye.  I’m going to miss when Nathan finishes first and looks up at me with a huge grin and how Anthony always has to double check Nathan’s side to see if any drop was left behind.  I’m going to miss hearing their excitement when Steve went into their rooms to wake them up and bring them to me in the mornings.  Most of all I’m going to miss that bonding time and the closeness of breast feeding; snuggling in with my boys and the incomparable feeling of serenity, peace, and the power of being the solution to most tears.  Breastfeeding twins was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done in the beginning but after that initial period it has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life.

That being said… it sure was nice waking up this morning and being able to wear a normal bra and shirt again.  I am going to enjoy this new found freedom.